Sex alone ≥ sex with a partner
Sure, coupled sex is amazing! However, there is some good news for you from Womanizer expert and certified sex coach Gigi Engle, author of “All The F*cking Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life”: “Your alone time is just as important as your partnered time, if not more so.”
“Embrace that,” she advises. These pointers may be useful.
Why is this important?
First of all, Engle explains, “it’s a wonderful way to connect with your body, become more confident in your body, and experience pleasure.”
Additionally, masturbating improves mood, promotes sleep, reduces tension, and eases pain. (And is particularly helpful for people who menstruate).
Sloane does, however, raise an important point when she says, “Pleasure is valid for pleasure’s sake — health benefits or not.”
Use items and toys to explore.
Sex toys, oh! Sweet, sweet sex gadgets that make you feel good!
Additionally, try a non-vibrating toy.
It’s a common misperception that vibrators are the first and last sex toys. They don’t.
Carly S. claims that the Njoy Pure Wand and Njoy Eleven are cult classics and that “glass and stainless steel wands are fun ways to apply to erogenous zones like the G-spot and P-spot, as well as a great way to play around with temperature.”
Prostate toys, anal beads, and non-vibrating butt plugs are available for your butt.
Bring a buzzy friend.
According to Sloane, vibrators just move in a different way than fingers. “Some people enjoy the speed, while others need it to get off.”
There are countless varieties of vibrators, ranging from those designed specifically for your external parts (such as vibrating cock rings, wand vibrators, clit vibrators, and finger vibrators) to those intended for internal use (such as vibrating butt plugs, vibrating prostate massagers, and G-spot vibrators).
Body-positive sex educator Carly S. of The Pleasure Chest says, “I suggest long-handled toys like wand vibrators and thrusting vibrators for people with larger bodies, as they make it easier to reach your genitals.”
Egg on a stick vibrators, G-spot vibrators, and double-ended dildos are a good option, too, she says.
She adds that double-ended dildos, G-spot vibrators, and egg-on-a-stick vibrators are also good choices.
Bring a sex pillow in.
For solo sex, Carly S. has one rule: “Work smarter, not harder.”
Other than vibrators, how does she go about doing that? A wedge (like the Liberator Wedge) or sex pillow (like Dame Pillo).
“They can make it easier to reach your bits and help you get comfortable for an orgasm.”
Make use of a toy remote control.
“Remote or app-controlled vibrators allow you to position the sex toy and then adjust the vibration and intensity from the app, which is ideal for people with limited range of motion and mobility issues,” Sloane explains.
She suggests the b-vibe Rimming plug for anyone who likes bum play and the We-Vibe Moxie as a fantastic panty vibrator for anyone with vulvas.
In order to get it on, get in the mood.
Engle advises, “Seduce yourself.” Although everyone’s experience will be different, she advises trying the following if you’re stuck for ideas:
Light the candles and turn off the lights.
Apply oil or cream on your limbs.
Create a sex playlist and play it.
Breathe deeply.
Switch off your phone.
Experiment with different strokes,
Try several stroking techniques; don’t be a one-trick pony.
Try this if you have a clit:
Rotate your fingers clockwise and counterclockwise.
diagonally moving from left to right, then from right to left.
To lessen the pain, place your labia over your clitoris.
clit-tapping.
putting pressure on your pubic region.
If your penis is available, try:
twisting strokes that resemble tornadoes.
Using one hand to move up and down the shaft and the other to tap the head.
Your rod is double-fisting.
gaining a solid grip and bending back and forth.
sliding back down more slowly after yanking up with quick strokes.
Engle advises, “Once you find something that feels good, stick with it.” “An orgasm can be triggered by consistency.”
stroker for the stomach
“It’s great to have your sex toy on your stomach because you can basically ride it to an orgasm,” Engle explains. “Your body weight and gravity work together to apply additional pressure to your cock or clit, which can result in a more intense sensation.”
If you have a penis, you might try the Tenga Onacup with lubrication. Additionally, you may try grinding against a vibrator the size of your palm, such as the Le Wand Point, if you have a vulva.
Include a bystander
Two of the most prevalent sexual fantasies include having sex in public (exhibitionism) and watching others have sex (voyeurism).
Here’s how to creatively incorporate them into your single sex life if you have one.
FaceTime with your partner
According to Carly S., “it can be really hot to put on a sexy show for someone else while touching yourself.”
Additionally, “they’ll be able to pick up some tricks and tips about how you like to be touched,” based on where you hold the camera.
Great sex alone now, great sex with a companion later.
Try masturbating together.
Dealing with your negative self? Why not ask your significant other to observe? Or have them have a little sex by themselves, right next to you. Caring is sharing!
Increase your enjoyment
More precisely, increase your enjoyment. “If you like smoking marijuana and it’s legal, consider incorporating the ritual of getting high into your solo sex life,” advises Carly S.
Try THC arousal oil or THC suppositories as well, but only in states where marijuana is legal.